The AFCB Snootsworth Advent Calendar 2021

[Ken Baileys Ghost]

Unlike Ryan's career, I can't see that going down the toilet anytime soon.

 

[New Old Cherry]

Geeeeesh ..Snoots !...I was wuz jist tuckin' into me cornflakes with grapes and bananas ..... expecting to see some silk adorned nubbies and rumps...and this turgid wee man pan fayre rocks up!

Hopefully you'll come into your best form directly Sir !
Top Oh .

 

[Audenshaw Cherry]

Ugh!!! I can never unremember that now!!!!

 

[Lord Snooty]

We open our third frosty window thinking of tonight’s wintry clash against league leaders Fulham.
As we shiver in the cold we this could be difficult as we are down to our bare bones.
Nine injured players beegads!
But chums we have something that is devilishly powerful, something damned magical, something that can help us rise up against all the odds.
Our very own good luck charm:
NNM!
Look away now if you’re likely to be upset for here is our potent omen!

NUNS!




NURSES!




MAIDS!


COME ON YOU CHERRYBOYS!!!!!!!

 

[wingsnwheels]

I hope that the nurse isn't working on the cardiac ward! Got my dicky ticker racing.

 

[New Old Cherry]

I hope that the nurse isn't working on the cardiac ward! Got my dicky ticker racing.

I think you mean your ticking dicky ..Wingser mate !

 

[New Old Cherry]

The Lord is out of the play-oof places and into the Automatics with that spread of results.
However ..the middle one needs to take one step forward and square off her Port side ..maybe re - tension a guy rope attached to her rigging!

 

[fred1407]

Not a religious man Lord Snooty but i think these young ladies might have lied about being nuns just to get you attention Sir

 

[Audenshaw Cherry]

Not a religious man Lord Snooty but i think these young ladies might have lied about being nuns just to get you attention Sir

Well it jolly well worked!!! May they bring us much happiness.

 

[Sweetcherrity]

That nun is wearing very sensible shoes - looks like a pair my elderly mother would wear!

 

[redskins]

Once more onto the breeches my dear friends!!

 

[Toronto John]

Well it jolly well worked!!! May they bring us much happiness.

Bringing "much a-penis" more like.

 

[Ken Baileys Ghost]

That nun is wearing very sensible shoes - looks like a pair my elderly mother would wear!

Maybe the nun was hoping to pull Wayne Rooney.

 

[GrahamH]

We need them tonight!

At this rate they might be the new back three. Although they all look a bit more forwards to Me.

 

[thegazzyb]

Well done ladies !!!
Before the game we would have taken going into the lead in magnificent style and holding on bravely for an excellent point in the end !
your powers !

 

[Toronto John]

Well done ladies !!!
Before the game we would have taken going into the lead in magnificent style and holding on bravely for an excellent point in the end !
your powers !

The ladies are always good for an excellent point in the end.

 

[thegazzyb]

The ladies are always good for an excellent point in the end.

I’ll set them up and you knock them out of the park John !

 

[Lord Snooty]

Ho ho ho chums.
And our 4th Advent Calendar window is dedicated to all of us who made it such a cracking atmosphere at Fulham last night.
The Putney Stand was a red and black paradise as we cheered our chaps on.
Our Yuletide calendar explains last night…

The Fulham Fans:


Our Fans:


Dominic Solanke:


Steve Cook:

 

[Ken Baileys Ghost]

Ho ho ho chums.
And our 4th Advent Calendar window is dedicated to all of us who made it such a cracking atmosphere at Fulham last night.
The Putney Stand was a red and black paradise as we cheered our chaps on.
Our Yuletide calendar explains last night…

The Fulham Fans:

View attachment 6777
Our Fans:

View attachment 6778
Dominic Solanke:

View attachment 6779
Steve Cook:

View attachment 6780

Snooty, I know he only came on as a sub, but you forgot Ben Pearson.

 

[Lord Snooty]

Already the 5th of December and Christmas gets that little bit nearer.
Ding dong merrily on high!
Today as we open our Advent window we find a Yuletide Email written to my good self from our midfield favourite Jefferson Lerma.
Recently Scott Parker was amazed that Jefferson had been reported for using bad language during a game as he hardly spoke any English.
Well I am tempted to say that this Email clearly shows that Jefferson’s grasp of English is rapidly improving.
It reads:

Dear Lord Fūck,
Fūck Fūck Fūck Fūck Fūck Fūck off.
Pass you Fūcker
Give me the fūcking ball!
Could you direct me to the nearest train station please?
My meal was lovely, can I have the bill please?
Fūck off ref.
Are you Fūcking blind ref?
Where is the nearest hospital please?
A pint of best bitter please, landlord.
Shít, shít, shít, shít, shít, shít, shít, shít, shít.
You are a total wánker you fūcking tosser.
Where is the Colombian embassy?
You look nice, you have pretty eyes.
Knob, prick, fùck, píss, cock, can you tell me the time?
Thank you.
Yes the weather is quite mild for this time of year.
Fūck.

Merry Píssmas,
Drop back,
Keep shape.
Kind fūcks,
Jefferson xxxxx

PS Bōllocks Watford.