The AFCB Snootsworth Advent Calendar 2023.

Jacks said:
A really beautiful Country full of lovely people,Bangkok is buzzing and totally safe in my experience. Hua Hin is my favourite area, great beach and 5 golf courses! Where else do you get wee monkeys running on the fairway to pinch your balls !
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Never visited tbh. See its described as more relaxed than pattaya... which I also haven't visited.

Like yiu say, beautiful country. I liked chiang mai, kho pha ngan, kho tao... for varying reasons!!

Plus it's surrounded by amazing/intersting countries like Cambodia, Vietnam and Laos.

I like thst region as really feels like you've been away, somewhere totally different culturally compared to more western countries.

It is safe I'm general. Only agg I saw was drunk westerners fighting amongst themselves and one occasion where a Thai taxi driver really shown up a loud, aggressive western tourist. A good lesson in not judging someone's ability to handle themselves in a physical confrontation by size alone!
 
Jacks said:
A really beautiful Country full of lovely people,Bangkok is buzzing and totally safe in my experience. Hua Hin is my favourite area, great beach and 5 golf courses! Where else do you get wee monkeys running on the fairway to pinch your balls !
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We went to Hua Win years ago. Very quaint railway station(think that is all its famous for)
 
MB1980 said:
Never visited tbh. See its described as more relaxed than pattaya... which I also haven't visited.

Like yiu say, beautiful country. I liked chiang mai, kho pha ngan, kho tao... for varying reasons!!

Plus it's surrounded by amazing/intersting countries like Cambodia, Vietnam and Laos.

I like thst region as really feels like you've been away, somewhere totally different culturally compared to more western countries.

It is safe I'm general. Only agg I saw was drunk westerners fighting amongst themselves and one occasion where a Thai taxi driver really shown up a loud, aggressive western tourist. A good lesson in not judging someone's ability to handle themselves in a physical confrontation by size alone!
Click to expand...
Quite funny how some tourists think the Country is one big love in,saw a small,wiry Thai nearly knock a fat,gobby Yanks head off,for messing with his daughter/wife,lovely people,but not to be messed with
I cycled from Seoul to Busan with my daughter a month ago.South Korea is also a fantastic place,totally trustworth could leave bikes,panniers etc.without a problem,had to spend one night in a love motel through lack of accommodation, daughter was a bit worried but the Madam in charge was great,gave us a couple of rooms next to Hers,away from the 'action' I got a bollocking for not taking off my shoes in the room though, which I alway forget to do in eastern countries ,would recommend to anyone for a visit
 
GaryRB said:
We went to Hua Win years ago. Very quaint railway station(think that is all its famous for)
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Yes indeed,King used to take his holidays there every year,they really loved their King and he seemed a good egg,canny saxophonist apparently. I actually got the train from Bangkok on one occasion,went 3rd class,basically a wooden bench to sit on,cost about 2 bob!
 
Jacks said:
Quite funny how some tourists think the Country is one big love in,saw a small,wiry Thai nearly knock a fat,gobby Yanks head off,for messing with his daughter/wife,lovely people,but not to be messed with
I cycled from Seoul to Busan with my daughter a month ago.South Korea is also a fantastic place,totally trustworth could leave bikes,panniers etc.without a problem,had to spend one night in a love motel through lack of accommodation, daughter was a bit worried but the Madam in charge was great,gave us a couple of rooms next to Hers,away from the 'action' I got a bollocking for not taking off my shoes in the room though, which I alway forget to do in eastern countries ,would recommend to anyone for a visit
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Yes indeed. Land of smiles for sure abd very accommodating, welcoming and tolerant of tourist more base behaviours as a generalisation. Plus whole 'face' culture. But underneath quite streetwise, proud people. But yiu need to be quite offensive, out of line to extract trouble from them ime. But they're not afraid to 'lower" themselves to violence, be it themselves or connections if yiu cross the line. Plenty of males somewhat adept at muay Thai and no doubt a fair few Billy big balls alphas have learnt the hard way.

South Korea sounds excellent. Not particularly popular with tourist/traveller set as if iirc much higher cost of living/expensive compared to other Eastern countries.

Iirc one of best, if not best educated countries going by metrics available.

Going by bike must have been incredible. I like trying to get out of more touristy built up areas to get flavour of lesser known parts in any country. Some of best memories was travelling out into countryside in nam, Cambodia. Mind blowing scenery, sunsets. Looking at my watch thinking people back in office right now abd here I am trying to savour it (without wanting yo sound too pretentious). At times Thinking hard to imagine some of the atrocities that happened there not that long ago.
 
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MB1980 said:
Yes indeed. Land of smiles for sure abd very accommodating, welcoming and tolerant of tourist more base behaviours as a generalisation. Plus whole 'face' culture. But underneath quite streetwise, proud people. But yiu need to be quite offensive, out of line to extract trouble from them ime. But they're not afraid to 'lower" themselves to violence, be it themselves or connections if yiu cross the line. Plenty of males somewhat adept at muay Thai and no doubt a fair few Billy big balls alphas have learnt the hard way.

South Korea sounds excellent. Not particularly popular with tourist/traveller set as if iirc much higher cost of living/expensive compared to other Eastern countries.

Iirc one of best, if not best educated countries going by metrics available.
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I also went to Japan and China,along with Korea,and was very impressed with many aspects of these Countries. China a bit oppressive at the airport,I always get pulled out of line for some reason! Costs wise,I got the impression that with price rises in our Country,it felt much the same for accomodation and food

Apologise for waffle Lord S hopefully can offer this morsel in recompense
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Ho ho ho chums!
Christmas wouldn’t be Christmas without Lee Bradbury’s annual Yuletide card to the club.
So on this 8th day of Advent let us open our window to read Lee’s card:

IMG_5148.jpeg

FAO: Mr Andone CocaCola,

Hello Andy!
Itss mee Eel.
Eel Blueberry.
You downt mined me cawling yoo Andy do yoo?
Wen I seee yoo on tv yoo remined mee of a yung Seve BagofSpearmints the famus Spanish golferr.

Yoo is dooing well good at ABC Bornmuff.
Hav yoo herd of mee?
I am Eel and I wass champion bockser at Deen Caught.
I wass also a soljer, player annd manijer.
I wass dead goood two.

Unfortyounatelee I losst my larst jobb as manijer of Eastleigh.
I putt it down sumwhere and I haven’t been Abel to find it agen!
Tee hee
Mum ses have I putt it under the bedd?
The fanns at Eastleigh wer not that nyce to me tho and sed I cowdnt manij a paper bag…butt I CANN! So long as it’s not tied at the topp.

Andy noww ime not a manijer, i am acting as a coach.
A train coach.
Choo chooo.
Mumm gets annoyed wiv me charging round the howse choo chooing and letting off steem.
Wiv all the bayked beens I eat ime bound to let off steem! Ha ha.
I have also bin acting as a consultant to a nummmber off clubs.
Wags nightclub in Southampton is my faverit.
I consult the bloke behinde the barr about the pryce of a pint and then I drink it tee hee!

Seryouslee Andy I am desprit four a jobb.
Wood you or Bill Folly hav me back at ABC?
I cood be putt in charj off umbrella andd flarsk secyouritty perhapps?
Ime allso goood wiv blak paynt.
Or maybee a klub ambarseador?
I cood show visiturs famus sites around the klubb:
The Adam Smiff Scool of drama.
Philip Billing’s leggs
The newly renaymed joonior Stanislas hospital sweet now known as the tyler adams medikal senter.
I cood even werk as a cleener for yoo and tidy upp all the strypes lefft by Scott Parker when hee left.

Yoo seee this krismus Andy ime feeling a bitt lownly.
No wun wantss the likes of mee any moor.
Ime cawled a footbawlingg dinosaur nowadays.
The ownly ‘high press’ I know is when I putt on the tite pair of underpants I downt lyke.
In mi dayy a box to box playerr was a mayt of yoors who was sucksessful pulling girls at the disco.

I keeep myself fromm being board bye riting my noo book:
‘Lee Bradbury, A Life’
Trubble iss I hav no idea hoo this Lee Bradbury bloke is.

Anyway Andy if yoo neeed mee for anyfing justt let me no!
Mum ses my chiken nuggits and chipps are reddy so ile bid yoo goodbye…orr shood I say ‘au Renoir’ wot wiv yoo beeing spanish tee hee.
Happy krismus to won and awl.
Luv
Leee xxxxxx

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A Few Good NNM by GrahamH.

Scene One: A Dean Court Room.

Lord Snooty is in the witness box and Lt. GrahamH is cross examining the witness.

GrahamH: "Did you order a code NNM?"

Lord Snooty: "Son..."

GrahamH: "No, he plays for Spurs and he's not that sort of player..."

Lord Snooty: "You snot-nosed little..."

GrahamH: "Did you order a code NNM?"

Lord Snooty: "We live in a world that has N and those N are guarded by Ms with guns. Who's going to do it, you, you Lt. GrahamH? I have a greater responsibility for NNM than you could possibly fathom. What do you want?"

GrahamH: "I want the NNM."

Lord Snooty: "You can't handle the NNM!"

GrahamH: "Did you order a code NNM?

Lord Snooty: "YOU'RE GOD DAMN RIGHT I DID!"
 
Jacks said:
A really beautiful Country full of lovely people,Bangkok is buzzing and totally safe in my experience. Hua Hin is my favourite area, great beach and 5 golf courses! Where else do you get wee monkeys running on the fairway to pinch your balls !
Click to expand...
Kenya, Loads of Vervet and Baboons crossing the fairways and also Leopards lying in the trees watching you tee off on the 17th hole at Karen GC.
 
Lord Snooty said:
Ho ho ho chums!
Christmas wouldn’t be Christmas without Lee Bradbury’s annual Yuletide card to the club.
So on this 8th day of Advent let us open our window to read Lee’s card:

View attachment 12623

FAO: Mr Andone CocaCola,

Hello Andy!
Itss mee Eel.
Eel Blueberry.
You downt mined me cawling yoo Andy do yoo?
Wen I seee yoo on tv yoo remined mee of a yung Seve BagofSpearmints the famus Spanish golferr.

Yoo is dooing well good at ABC Bornmuff.
Hav yoo herd of mee?
I am Eel and I wass champion bockser at Deen Caught.
I wass also a soljer, player annd manijer.
I wass dead goood two.

Unfortyounatelee I losst my larst jobb as manijer of Eastleigh.
I putt it down sumwhere and I haven’t been Abel to find it agen!
Tee hee
Mum ses have I putt it under the bedd?
The fanns at Eastleigh wer not that nyce to me tho and sed I cowdnt manij a paper bag…butt I CANN! So long as it’s not tied at the topp.

Andy noww ime not a manijer, i am acting as a coach.
A train coach.
Choo chooo.
Mumm gets annoyed wiv me charging round the howse choo chooing and letting off steem.
Wiv all the bayked beens I eat ime bound to let off steem! Ha ha.
I have also bin acting as a consultant to a nummmber off clubs.
Wags nightclub in Southampton is my faverit.
I consult the bloke behinde the barr about the pryce of a pint and then I drink it tee hee!

Seryouslee Andy I am desprit four a jobb.
Wood you or Bill Folly hav me back at ABC?
I cood be putt in charj off umbrella andd flarsk secyouritty perhapps?
Ime allso goood wiv blak paynt.
Or maybee a klub ambarseador?
I cood show visiturs famus sites around the klubb:
The Adam Smiff Scool of drama.
Philip Billing’s leggs
The newly renaymed joonior Stanislas hospital sweet now known as the tyler adams medikal senter.
I cood even werk as a cleener for yoo and tidy upp all the strypes lefft by Scott Parker when hee left.

Yoo seee this krismus Andy ime feeling a bitt lownly.
No wun wantss the likes of mee any moor.
Ime cawled a footbawlingg dinosaur nowadays.
The ownly ‘high press’ I know is when I putt on the tite pair of underpants I downt lyke.
In mi dayy a box to box playerr was a mayt of yoors who was sucksessful pulling girls at the disco.

I keeep myself fromm being board bye riting my noo book:
‘Lee Bradbury, A Life’
Trubble iss I hav no idea hoo this Lee Bradbury bloke is.

Anyway Andy if yoo neeed mee for anyfing justt let me no!
Mum ses my chiken nuggits and chipps are reddy so ile bid yoo goodbye…orr shood I say ‘au Renoir’ wot wiv yoo beeing spanish tee hee.
Happy krismus to won and awl.
Luv
Leee xxxxxx

View attachment 12624
Click to expand...

Different class :)
 
Yikes chums!
Another match day?
They are coming thick and fast like the snowflakes at Christmas.
As we open our 9th Advent window today we of course know what we must do.
Call upon the currently unbeaten lucky charm that is NNM!
Those easily offended look away now…












NUNS!!!

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NURSES!!!

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MAIDS!!!

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COME ON YOU CHERRYBOYS!!!! :tophat:
 
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