Lord Snooty
Fans' Favourite
Fletch has been given a new role at the club cementing his position in the new Scott Parker regime.
He is to be Technical Resources Director and is responsible for:
-Cones (movement of)
-Balls (strategic placement of)
-Bib distribution
-Retrieval Services (of various small items of rubbish and miscellaneous litterage)
-Whistle shining
-Shin pad distribution
-Changing room Hygiene services (removal of mud, gum & associated sporting debris thereafter)
-Sanitation servicing (ensuring toilets and wash basins are of professional standards)
-Ego Massaging (exaggerated praise mechanisms to be implemented for both insecure and egotistical playing staff)
-Car Park ticketing
-Sandwiches and associated bread products
-Milk
-Fist Pumping (to be engaged passionately at the end of first team matches in front of stadium customers)
- Badge Kissing (to be engaged as above)
-Errrrrr
-That’s it.
He is to be Technical Resources Director and is responsible for:
-Cones (movement of)
-Balls (strategic placement of)
-Bib distribution
-Retrieval Services (of various small items of rubbish and miscellaneous litterage)
-Whistle shining
-Shin pad distribution
-Changing room Hygiene services (removal of mud, gum & associated sporting debris thereafter)
-Sanitation servicing (ensuring toilets and wash basins are of professional standards)
-Ego Massaging (exaggerated praise mechanisms to be implemented for both insecure and egotistical playing staff)
-Car Park ticketing
-Sandwiches and associated bread products
-Milk
-Fist Pumping (to be engaged passionately at the end of first team matches in front of stadium customers)
- Badge Kissing (to be engaged as above)
-Errrrrr
-That’s it.